It’s the most wonderful time of the year… or is it? For many, December is actually one of the most stressful times. There’s family pressure, financial strain, endless to-do lists, travel stress, and let’s not forget the emotional toll the holidays can take (missing loved ones, dealing with tricky family dynamics, etc.). As a therapist – and a human – I’ve learned that one of the best antidotes to holiday stress is mindfulness. In this blog, I want to share how practicing mindfulness can help you stay grounded and actually enjoy the season more, plus some simple mindful exercises you can try amidst the chaos.
Why Mindfulness for the Holidays?
Mindfulness, in a nutshell, means bringing your attention to the present moment with an attitude of openness and non-judgment. It’s about being here and now, rather than caught up in regrets about the past or worries about the future. During the holidays, we often get stuck in our heads: planning the next event, replaying old family arguments, striving for that “perfect” holiday feeling and then stressing when reality doesn’t match. Mindfulness gently pulls us out of that mental whirlwind and into what’s happening right now.
For example, instead of panicking about how you’ll get everything done before Christmas, a mindful approach might be: “Okay, right now I am wrapping this one gift. I’ll give this task my full attention – noticing the pattern of the paper, the sound of the scissors, the feeling of the tape on my fingers.” It might sound silly, but try it – you may find that wrapping gifts becomes a calming mini-meditation instead of a frenzied chore. Mindfulness turns down the volume on our anxious brain and turns up the richness of our actual experience.
Common Holiday Stress Triggers (and Mindful Remedies):
Busy Schedules: Holiday parties, kids’ events, shopping – your calendar is full. Mindful Remedy: Breath Breaks. Before switching from one activity to the next, take 3 deep breaths. Inhale slowly (maybe think “breathing in calm”), exhale slowly (“breathing out stress”). Those few seconds can reset your nervous system. Also, practice saying No mindfully – check in with yourself about which events truly matter to you and graciously decline others. Each “no” is a “yes” to something else (like yes to sanity!).
Family Tensions: Not all gatherings are like a Hallmark movie. Old conflicts or differing personalities can cause anxiety. Mindful Remedy: Grounding in the Present. When conversation gets tense or you feel yourself getting triggered by Uncle Joe’s comments, notice what’s happening in your body. Maybe your chest tightens or face gets hot. Instead of reacting on autopilot, silently name it: “I’m feeling anger” or “This is anxiety.” Feel your feet on the floor or the sensation of the chair supporting you. This anchors you. Take a slow breath. Mindfulness doesn’t mean you won’t still feel annoyed, but it gives you a space to choose a response (maybe calmly changing the topic) rather than an unmindful reaction (like snapping back a hurtful retort).
Loneliness or Grief: Holidays can highlight who’s missing or what’s not going well in life. Mindful Remedy: Compassionate Acknowledgment. Allow yourself to feel what you feel, without judgment. You might mindfully light a candle in memory of a lost loved one and just sit with both sadness and gratitude for them. If you’re alone, treat yourself as you would a dear friend: perhaps mindfully sipping a cup of cocoa and savoring its warmth, or going for a gentle walk and noticing winter scenery. Be present with your experience instead of numbing it – often, the pain eases when we face it tenderly.
Financial Strain: Worries about money can surge with gift-buying and travel costs. Mindful Remedy: Focus on Values, Not Stuff. Bring awareness to why you’re stressing – is it a fear of disappointing others? Remind yourself what truly matters about the holidays for you. Perhaps write a mindful gratitude list of non-material things (like having your health, or favorite memories that didn’t cost a dime). This can shift your mindset from scarcity to abundance. When shopping, practice mindful spending: take a pause and breathe before each purchase, checking if it aligns with your values and budget. You might realize a heartfelt letter or a simple homemade gift can mean more than an expensive gadget.
Simple Mindfulness Practices for the Season:
The 5-4-3-2-1 Holiday Senses Exercise: If you feel overwhelmed (say, in a crowded mall or loud family kitchen), use your five senses to ground yourself. Silently notice: 5 things you can see (the twinkle of string lights, the color of wrapping paper), 4 things you can feel (your sweater on your skin, the warmth of a mug), 3 things you hear (holiday music, laughter, or even the hum of the heater), 2 things you smell (pine tree, cookies, or maybe just winter air), 1 thing you taste (a mint, or coffee, or the aftertaste of dinner). This brings you back to here and now when your mind is scattering in all directions.
Mindful Eating – Savor the Holiday Treats: Instead of mindlessly inhaling a plate of cookies while stressed (and then maybe feeling guilty), try choosing one treat and really savor it. Notice the appearance (the sprinkles, the shape), the smell (is that cinnamon?), take a small bite and close your eyes, truly taste it slowly – the texture, the sweetness. You may find you’re satisfied with less, and you’ve turned a simple snack into a delightful moment. This practice can reduce overeating and increase enjoyment. No need to label foods “bad” or feel guilty – give yourself permission to enjoy mindfully, and you likely will feel more content and in control.
One-Minute Meditation (Ornament Gaze): If formal meditation feels hard to squeeze in, try this: take a minute by your Christmas tree or a holiday decoration. Sit or stand comfortably, and just gaze at a single ornament or flickering candle flame. Observe it as if you’re seeing it for the first time – the colors, the way light reflects off it. Let other thoughts float by like clouds (“Oh I still need to buy milk – not now, thinking later”). Gently bring attention back to that ornament whenever the mind drifts. Breathe naturally. Even 60 seconds of this can center you. It’s like a mini mental vacation, and the festive setting makes it pleasant.
Mindful Snowfall (or Nature) Observation: If you live where it snows, watching snowflakes can be incredibly meditative. Take a few moments at a window or outside (bundled up). Notice how the snow falls – steadily or swirling? Notice the unique shapes of flakes on your glove or the sound of snow crunching underfoot. If no snow, do the same with whatever nature is around – the pattern of bare tree branches, the feel of cool air entering your nose, the sounds of birds in winter. Nature has a way of calming our nervous system if we truly pay attention to it.
Box Breathing Gift to Yourself: Here’s a technique Navy SEALs use to stay calm under pressure – so yes, it can help when your in-laws are asking pointed questions 😅. It’s called box breathing: Inhale for 4 counts, hold lungs full for 4, exhale for 4, hold lungs empty for 4, then repeat. Picture drawing a square with your breath – each side is 4 counts. Do this a few times. It lowers stress hormones and can steady a racing heart. Consider it a gift to yourself when you need inner peace. You can do it discreetly anytime (like in the bathroom during a chaotic gathering – no one will know you’re box breathing in there!).
Mindfulness Doesn’t Mean Avoiding the Holiday Fun:
One worry people have is, “If I’m being mindful and zen, will I be a detached observer and not fully celebrate?” Actually, it’s the opposite. Mindfulness helps you fully immerse in the joy when it’s there. If you’re singing carols with friends, mindfulness is noticing the warmth in your chest from that shared joy, hearing each note of the song fully. If you’re watching a child open a gift, mindfulness is putting aside your phone and truly seeing their excitement, feeling your own happiness in that moment.
Mindfulness also helps us handle the not-so-fun parts without them ruining everything. It’s like a mental buffer. You accept “Okay, this moment is frustrating,” handle it, and then you’re more able to shift back to enjoyment mode when something positive happens. Without mindfulness, one stressor can derail your whole day. With it, you acknowledge the stress but it doesn’t wholly consume you.
Mindfulness & Meaning:
Ultimately, being mindful during the holidays can enhance the meaning you derive from them. Instead of rushing through on autopilot and then wondering, “Where did the time go? I didn’t even enjoy it,” you’ll have pockets of real presence. You might notice a thoughtful comment from a relative and feel genuine gratitude. Or truly taste that special recipe passed down from grandma and feel connected to tradition. These little moments of presence are what string together to form contentment.
Mindfulness and Mental Health:
I also want to note: if you struggle with a mental health condition (anxiety, depression, etc.), the holidays can be extra hard. Mindfulness is a tool, not a cure-all. But it can complement other supports. For instance, someone with social anxiety might use mindfulness at a party to avoid spiraling (“I’m noticing my hands are sweaty and I’m thinking ‘everyone’s judging me’ – that’s anxiety talking. Coming back to the sensation of my breath for a moment…”). It pairs well with therapy techniques. And if things feel very overwhelming, it’s absolutely okay to seek professional help – think of it as another form of self-care. Sometimes the best present is giving yourself permission to get support.
Wrapping Up (Mindfully, of course):
As you navigate the busy, emotional, wonderful mess of the holiday season, I invite you to sprinkle in some mindfulness. Think of it as periodically tuning your instrument amid a long concert – a little adjustment keeps everything harmonious. You don’t have to do it perfectly (and ironically, trying to be a “perfect mindful yogi” is counter to mindfulness – it’s fine to get distracted or impatient; just notice that and gently try again).
Give yourself grace. Some moments you’ll lose your cool or get caught up in stress – that’s okay, you’re human. When you catch it, that moment of recognition is mindfulness itself! Then you can take a breath and begin again. Each moment is a new moment.
I truly hope you find pockets of peace this holiday season. They are there if we pay attention – in the sparkle of lights, in the laughter of a friend, even in the quiet of a snowy night. Wishing you a calmer, more present December. Happy Holidays from me and everyone at A Healing Place. We are grateful to be part of your year’s journey. 🎄🕯️✨
Blog written by:
Lisa Anderson
Owner of A Healing Place